I need to get this huge elephant out of the room, or more specifically out of my blog.  It’s so big and heavy that it’s blocking my creative flow.  A blog is much like reality TV. You have to be real or pretty soon you really won’t be here at all.


Elephant in the Room


Definition: an English metaphorical idiom for an obvious truth that is either being ignored or going unaddressed.

T.H. and I aren’t living together right now.   There ….  I said it.  When he started the 5000 sq. ft.  Red-Neck Renovation I moved to the neighboring ranch’s little guest cabin. I fixed  it up really cute for our  “long winter’s nap”.  I’ve been here 4 months.  T.H. spent 3 nights here and I haven’t seen him since.  I guess the cabin just wasn’t big enough for both of us.

He moved down to our hunting lodge in the little town where we get our mail.  For me it would be the equivalent of living in a middle-aged frat house complete with pool table and beer on tap and lots of “rowdy friends comin’ over tonight”.  It is there that he remains, fueling his resentment by giving me the silent treatment.

Whew! I feel better already now that I got that out.


What’s the rub? You ask.  Apparently it’s top secret classified information. Remember ….. he’s not talking. I can only guess. I guess it most likely is about the McMansion he’s building. At my age and stage of life I wanted to downsize, reduce overhead and be free of “stuff”. He wanted to super-size his life, increase overhead and get more stuff.  T.H. is building “his” dream house on “his” ranch (prenup) with “his” super-sized mortgage.  It’s not my dream. I just couldn’t go there with him. (emotionally, spiritually, physically and especially financially)

Silent scorn is the only tool that T.H. has in his toolbox for dealing with conflict.  We’ve spent a good half of our marriage in that mode.  The upside for me is that when he’s not speaking to me, that gives me a lot more time to pursue my passions. It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

A neighbor asked a friend of mine.  …. “What are they building up there?  A duplex? ”

Now that’s funny.


Love,   Cowgirl Red     aka  Terah



 My little cabin on the hill. No room for elephants.

P.S. It’s good for me to take a stand that’s good for me.  And it’s good to talk about the elephant in the room. It’s real. And being real is good for me, too.







  1. Don’t your horses need new shoes? Ha!

    • Haha Cat! yea ponies need some new shoes!!! Way past due. You crack me up. Thanks for reading my bog. Terah

  2. Let go, and allow the Universe to take you for the intended ride, allowing the force of change to work with you rather than pin you down.

    I found this on a post and read it daily, now passing it on to you! I think the intended ride is just for you!


    • Cheri, that is beautiful. I’m saving it, too. THe intended ride. The Universe speaks to us through our good friends. You.xoxo Terah

  3. Lisa at Greenbow says

    I hate to hear that you are in limbo Terah. It is a sad state of affairs. Building / relocating is often a strain on a relationship. Hence we live in our little house. Hang in there. It might be worth it.

  4. Holy Crap……..that is big,,,,,,,,,,what the heck?????? Sad for you that things are not going so well……….This snow is gonna melt……..the sun is gonna shine………..you’re gonna get your trailer out and go ride…………then You will Feel much BETTER!!!!!!!!!!! Love You Friend!!! Take Care of YOU!!!!!